Friday, November 20, 2009

A Former Vietnam Marine Takes The Long Walk Home

By R. B. Stuart

In 1969, influenced by a buddy who wanted to be a Marine, Ronald C. J. Zaleski of Flanders, NY entered into the Vietnam draft lottery. His father a WWII veteran was proud he joined, but Zaleski, who hated the war, was ashamed that he signed up to spite his parents. Zaleski was adamant about Vietnam and didn't believe in killing, but as a hostile and defiant 20 year-old when his mother questioned his actions he told her, "he wanted to see what it was like to kill somebody." His statements hurt sending her off in tears. Zaleski came to regret that action too.

He realized when arrived to Marine boot camp that it wasn't a game and "they really do kill people." So Zaleski prayed to God, "I don't have the courage to shoot another man...I'm afraid, I want to live," and in the last moment before deployment his orders were changed. He remained stateside as a clerk typist from 1970 - 1972, while five of his buddies were deployed. He always felt that he had turned his back on his buddies and the other soldiers, his guilt compounded when two of them were killed in action and the other three maimed for life. "During a majority of that time, I was angry and arrogant."

"When the war ended in 1972 at the age of 22 I stopped wearing shoes. I didn't like them to begin with, and felt I had done nothing as a Marine. So as a way of doing penance, I silently made a lifelong commitment that I would go shoeless to honor the soldiers in Vietnam who fought, when I could not, and for those who died, to give me life," Zaleski admitted.

But 34 years later all that changed when a little boy approached him last year and asked, "Why don't you wear shoes?" "I realized then that my penance was useless, as it hadn't helped a soul...it was all talk. Those soldiers fought for my freedom. What did they die for? It wasn't a noble or just war. I realized I must make amends and do something good for the boys in this war," he confided.

Zaleski used his outspokenness and indifference as he refused to be part of the problem. He explained, "I see this war in Iraq being worse than the Vietnam War, because it's the same type of war. The soldiers are going through civilian's homes killing women and children because they don't know who the enemy is. Because of our medical and technological advances since the 1970's, we are able to save them physically but not psychologically or emotionally. I see the same thing happening all over again with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder [PTSS or PTSD], so I have vowed not to be part of the problem."

Part of the vow by this 56 year-old born on Veteran's Day is to walk the 2,174 mile Appalachian Trail across 14 states barefoot, in an attempt to bring attention to veteran's past and present with PTSD, and to offer those soldiers free doctors visits to help them cope with this disorder.

His voice cracked, "These kids could be my sons...they're 21 years old and have killed women and children. Some have asked me 'if they're going to hell,' " he wept.

Last year on Memorial Day Zaleski began his "Long Walk Home." He began a web site that chronicled his days on the trail, adding daily journaling and photos of people he met and places he stopped at along the way.

"The Appalachian Trail is America's vision quest. I started out on this walk to bring awareness to PTSD, but it evolved to where we're trying to get a bill passed to make it mandatory for soldiers to receive intense counseling for PTSD before they're discharged. Because if we can teach them how to kill in a 12 week boot camp, then we can help them get reaclimated into the civilian world," Valeski commented.

Valeski began his walk at Mt. Katahdin, Maine. All of his gear was strapped to him and made out of a lightweight and durable white plastic Tyvek (the material used in express mail bags by the US Post Office, DHL, etc.). He would walk 10 - 20 miles each day, and sleep in a Tyvek tent and sleeping bag. By the end of the first portion of the walk, over four and half months he trekked almost 1,400 miles. He suspended his journey in Monto Bello, Virginia due to weather. In April, Zaleski will pick up where he left off completing his vision quest by July in Georgia.

His hopes and resolution this year is that he is able to conjoin efforts with Congress to have a bill passed making psychological programs available to soldiers returning post-Iraq. "I'm in the process of creating a comprehensive program for when the bill is passed it can be implemented right away," Zaleski said adding. "What it will do is help those veterans who aren't able to admit they have a problem. Especially, the 20 year-olds who have been trained to think he's the baddest, because he's been taught to shoot weapons and kill. What kid is going to admit he's having nightmares?"

This journey hasn't left Zaleski untouched, as he says it has humbled him. "I'm not angry anymore, I'm hurt. The things I've failed to do and have done by letting these kinds of things happen in this country has changed me. When I meet a soldier I san see their anger and pain...it brings me back to the Vietnam era when I was 22," he choked with tears.

"These guys aren't coming back the same. We're destroying this country from the inside out. These kids are coming back dysfunctional. A mother said to me, 'My son's back I don't know who he is.' Another woman says, 'My brothers back and I don't recognize him.' And one mother said, 'My son woke up at middle of the night and didn't know where he was, he thought he was in Iraq. I was afraid for my life and I called the police to come and take him away.' How does a child return home and tell his parents he's killed women and children? So instead they bury it deep inside and it pops up when they're walking down the street and see a child or woman and it reminds them of someone they've killed. How can you function again? That's why this bill is of utter importance. And we need everyone's help trying to get it passed," he ended.