We are a culture which is continually "stressed out." Plain and simple, this is bad for your love life, and not just because you missed dinner because you had to work late or were too tired to have sex. An adrenaline rush is not meant to be a constant state. There's no way Sandra Bullock could have fallen for Keanu Reeves in "Speed" if she was still driving that bus with the bomb. As Hans Selye, M.D. explains in his book "The Stress of Life", "At times of imminent danger, in the face of extreme stress, the body must use all its reserves just to keep alive; while it does this the less pressing demands of reproduction are necessarily neglected."

Stress is an equal opportunity offender where not only will women see changes in their monthly cycle but men also will experience reduced sex drive or sperm production. The importance of addressing the issue of hormonal balance is not only essential for lifting the icy lack of intimacy in the bedroom, but in promoting healthy fertility. Luckily many solutions can be found in the natural "basics."

SLEEP

Studies at the University of Helsinki in Finland actually discovered that how much sleep an individual needs can be genetically dictated. Whether you've got those "I am so not a morning person" genes or when not getting adequate sleep not only changes your mood and energy level but also directly affects your hormones there can be an easy fix. As a culture which prides itself on how many hours we work, the collective sleep deprivation takes a toll, and not just in the amount we have to spend on that under eye concealer for those dark circles.

One study at the University of Chicago found that a group of men who slept only four hours a night for six days in a row developed diabetes like symptoms. Their bodies couldn't regulate how it metabolized starches and sugars. This possibly explains that a good night's sleep not only keeps you happy, it also can prevent excess weight.

And if you want to know what a smoking gun is in terms of disturbing good sleep – it's the TV in the bedroom. And even worse? The laptop in bed. The energy emitted by these electronic devices is a stimulant and creates a mixed message of where you work and rest. Those in the know say the bed is for two things – sex and sleep. Okay and maybe a little Anais Nin reader on the bed stand.

MASSAGE

Once categorized as "pampering" a good massage is far from fluff, creating beneficial health effects such as increased circulation and the elimination of toxins. While you may be lying on the table thinking "ooh that feels so good," your cells are thinking the same thing as they are receiving oxygen and expelling waste. This is also why your massage therapist will advise you to drink lots of water to flush the released toxins from your system. The massage also acts a direct stress release. According to Ellen Cutler MD, "The nerve pathways carrying the sensation of touch to the brain are thicker, faster, and more numerous than the pathways that carry pain messages." By focusing on the pleasurable aspect the body is distracted from the pain and thus the tense muscles can relax.

The beauty of couples who practice the art of massage on each other is the healing power of a loving touch which may be sensual but not sexual. There's no expectation or pressure if one or the other isn't "in the mood," although the stress release which accompanies the good rub may be the perfect foreplay elixir.

WATER

There are predictions that future wars will be fought over clean water instead of oil. One of the most basic elements for human survival is taken for granted, and we have become nationally dehydrated. Our bodies are about 70 percent water. This water both brings in nourishment to our cells and takes away toxins. By the time we are thirsty we are already dehydrated. Think about how easy it would be to eliminate the "honey I have a headache" problem by simply increasing water intake. Often when we feel tired or are experiencing mood swings we are dehydrated. The American staples of caffeine and alcohol are also culprits in dehydration so we need to consume even more than the recommended six to eight glasses a day.

If you're working on that lingerie-ready body or those six-pack abs to turn on your mate, plentiful water is also a key to weight loss as well as when you're exercising to regulate body temperature, moderate cardiovascular stress, and improve performance. The key of course is to know your water cleanliness and its source. You don't want to be adding in as many toxins as you are flushing out. Bottled spring water is recommended as well as having your home source water tested for toxins.

READ THE LABEL

While pharmaceutical ads feature fast talkers to speed through the possible side effects as quickly as possible in their paid advertising time, it is a good lesson to all of us to spend a bit more time thinking about what we put in and on our bodies. We not only eat animal products but find them in our body lotions, shampoos, and make up. The excessive hormones used in raising these animals is then absorbed into our own bodies and can wreak havoc with our own hormonal systems, men and women alike.

Whether it is the growth hormones used in cows to increase their milk production or the antibiotics in the chicken industry or pesticides on our fruits and vegetables or the plastic they are wrapped in, it seems as Representative Rosa DeLauro who chairs the subcommittee that funds the FDA claims, "Our food safety system is broken." Taking a closer look at the label as well as searching out certified organic food and products will be worth that extra time at the grocery store.

As we learn that stress is not sexy and that our modern lives are filled with hazards to our hormonal health, we can all make more of an effort to bring in the basic support systems for relaxation and rejuvenation and release from toxic products and environments to ultimately bring back that lovin' feelin'.