Modern women are looking and feeling better than ever - now it is age instead of beauty that is in the eye of the beholder. Goldie Hawn has even inspired a whole new term "Glam-ma." Research conducted by Warren Sanderson from the University of Stonybrook calculated that in 2000 the average American was 35.3 years old and could plan to live another 43.5 more years. The study estimated that by 2050 the average age would rise to 41.7 with 45.8 future years to live. But it's not just about living longer, it's about living better. So is 40 the new 20?

I certainly see a difference now that I've reached 40. I live with a salt free diet, not for health reasons, but because I can't stand the way my triceps flesh jiggles when I shake the salt. However when I see pictures of myself and my girlfriends in college, I say, "What were we thinking?" We actually look much better now and also know never, never, to imbibe in a drink that is served out of a trash can.

My Body Myself

Often at twenty a woman is just coming to terms with her body. Either she is enjoying the bloom of effortless youth or she is engaged in a battle with everything she hates about her looks. The beauty of beauty at forty is that a woman's relationship with her looks has settled into more of a self aware negotiation. By this age women have learned subtle tricks of playing up their assets and hiding or minimizing their flaws. With proper make up, wardrobe, and hair styling, wonders can be achieved and she often has the funds to do so.

The difference between a 40 and a 20 year old is if the current fashion is unflattering we at 40 don't wear it. We know which designers work well for our figure type and invest in a few timeless pieces instead of running out to the mall each weekend for a new cute outfit. Far from matronly, sensuality is still in, just with knowledge of what to show and what to cover up.

However, as NASA knows so well, there is a difference in atmospheres known as gravity. Twenty year olds are much closer to the zero gravity of space where their body parts float while those of us back in Houston feel the pull of the earth. I can often spend as much on undergarments as I do on the outfit.

Face-ing The Truth

The universal tell tale sign of women aging is their skin. We have a billion dollar industry dedicated to moisturizers, toners, skin lighteners, wrinkle fillers, eye creams and sunscreens. While in our twenties we were swapping the best place for happy hour, in our forties a fabulous facialist is the hot gossip. Methods for maintaining firm and supple skin range from a diet with green tea and blueberries to surgery.

Most of the scientific evidence suggests that anti-oxidants as well as drinking plenty of water do make a huge difference in the skin. That combined with a good skin scare regimen which includes exfoliation and moisturizing and of course staying out of the sun or using a strong sunscreen is also the best defense. New products and treatments are constantly coming on the market to stop or reverse aging like microdermabrasion for the face or endermologie for cellulite. For the twenty year old, starting young in a healthy and protective skin care regime will serve them well in their forties as well as staying away from smoking.

The Balance Beam of Hormones

We now have a far better understanding of the female hormonal balances and imbalances where research recognizes the roller coaster ride of estrogen, progesterone, DHEA and testosterone which make up the female cocktail. Imbalances from PMS to menopause were much less understood and new solutions do not lead women to radical drug treatments or neglect. Instead, many all natural alternatives have been added to help keep women balanced, and in addition to diet and exercise and stress management, homeopaths and naturopaths can help women keep their youthful and fertile tracks much longer.

What the twenty year olds need to realize is the amount of artificial animal hormones which are in the food supply and products and to learn to do their own research on the increasingly toxic world we inhabit to keep their systems as healthy as possible. They will literally be inheriting the earth.

Brave Heart

Along with the body there are also the mind and the soul, and for women love can be as essential as water. There is no one more pure in love than a woman who has not yet had her heart broken - where her belief in herself, her lover, and their bond is unflappable. There's a reason that Shakespeare cast teenagers in his epic love story Romeo and Juliet. If the lovers had been forty they probably would have worked out their family differences with a little therapy and a good pre-nup or if they couldn't be together, instead of ending in death, she'd probably head to the spa and he to the golf course.

The beauty of being forty is that a woman knows she can survive heartbreak as painful and devastating as it seems because she's done it before. Try telling a twenty year old it will all be okay, life will go on, and she'll live to love again. While the faith in recovery is assuring, the accompanying scars also play into a woman's emotional psyche.

Although scar tissue is stronger than skin, it loses its rosy glow and remains impenetrable by the rays of the sun. Call it prudent or call it fear, self-protection will set up boundaries which will be harder for the next lance of love to permeate. Yet along with caution, love at forty also comes with a huge amount of gratitude. We know what we want and what brings out the best in us and when we find someone who shares that vision it feels miraculous.

Most importantly live fully in the moment – there are great benefits to being twenty and wonders that come with forty – and who knows, now maybe 60 will be the new 40.