Fern Mallis Photo by Rob Rich © 2006 robwayne1@aol.com 516-676-3939

Hamptonite Fern Mallis, who rules over Fashion Week, is ready to follow Betsey Johnson and do a cartwheel down the runway. She and her bosses at IMG just closed on a deal with Mercedes Benz USA to present all of IMG's properties - the shows in New York, Los Angeles, and Miami. This will be the first time all the shows will have a single sponsor and for at least the next three years. The Mercedes Benz banner starts unfurling with the February 2007 shows.

And, another fashion note, we told you how our favorite romance queen covergirl Cyndy Guyer was launching her own shoe line. Now she has even given us someplace to flaunt her sexy, romantic designs. With good friend Jenn Klein she has opened Wine & Roses, a dreamy wine bar on New York's Upper Westside - the perfect place for her to canoodle with handsome hubby, Southampton builder Andrew Catapano.

While we're on the romance circuit: all Gin Lane is abuzz about the upcoming nuptials of Blue Booker Minnie Mortimer and Oscar winning writer/director Stephen Gaghan of Traffic and Syriana fame. The old guard hasn't seen this "Old New York Society meets Hollywood royalty" since the days when Dina Merrill tied the knot with Cliff Robertson and before that Rocky Converse's betrothal to Gary Cooper. Personally, we feel the Meadow Club scene could definitely use a little Tinseltown Glitter. Things haven't been the same since producer Marty Richards sold his sprawling oceanfront estate.

You know when folks are talking about love the next topic is betrayal. All the social set –and realtors - are atwitter about the hoped for sale of former Blue Booker Caitlin Ormsby's Hill Street house. Seems no one is willing to go the $2.5 million asking price of which $2 million would go to Howard Gittes her "friend" whom she was accused of ripping off and convicted of such, amidst a blizzard of screeching tabloid headlines that had the Old Guard reeling…and checking with THEIR accountants.

We appreciate a good con as much as the next gal so we dropped by to see our old school chums Sharon and Richard Armstrong while they were here flogging Richard's delicious new novel "God Don't Shoot Craps" the story of a small time hustler who creates the perfect guaranteed to win gambling scheme to sell to dupes, only to find out it really works and now has the mob on his tail. Buzz is hot on the property with tough guys Dennis Farina and John Travolta eyeing the property. While we wish them great success we hope the Armstrong's don't give up their Georgetown digs and go Hollywood on us. They're the only safe house on the Beltway.

Have you heard too much about our BFF Gwen Stefani? Then stop reading now cause we're still got more on the hottest looking platinum blonde in our nabe. Seems Miss G. who has been popping up on best-dressed lists from here to Hong Kong is immortalizing her fab look in a series of dolls: The Hollerback Girls" - seven little Gwens, in replicas of her knockout outfits from her last tour, sure to thrill the little girl in all of us but probably not her four month old little man.

Those bad boys of Broadway are coming back! Matthew Broderick and his former "The Producers" and "The Odd Couple" co-star Nathan Lane are coming back to Broadway this season – but not together. Lane will be seen in the revival of Simon Gray's "Butley" {it's already sold $1 million in advance} and Broderick will take on the lead in "The Starry Messenger."

While we're on the subject of glittering things, we hear that Ellen Barkin is putting up for auction her not so small collection of baubles at Christie's next month including items from the late Duchess of Windsor's jewel box. Since splitting with oft married cosmetics tycoon Ron Perelman, it appears she's downsizing a bit.

Fashion Alert: You've probably heard if your fashionista antenna is up that Madrid, Milan and London have put a ban on those waif-like anorexic stick figures that have been strutting the catwalks long before Kate Moss got caught up with you know what.

Frankly, since the last time we wore a size 2, we were in rompers and beating our sandbox playmates with our shovel, we applaud this effort. Thank goodness at least Francisco Costa appreciates gals with a little bit of junk in the trunk – but then he's Brazilian. Still it gives hope to those of us who haven't squeezed into a single digit size since prep school.

Now that the traffic has abated and the group house rowdies have slunk back to their frat houses, we took a leisurely drive out to Montauk and caught some real old fashioned Hamptons action with a stop at Nick's on the beach where the real people hang. No size 2s in the crowd and the guys - from fisherman to financiers were real – no flashy Rolexes, no designer duds and the ratio 2 to 1 in Jennifer's favor. What a find!

Capping this were the vintage R&B and Reggae tunes laid on by soulful Ann Morgan and her band that transported us back to the days of the great beach club parties - pre-StarRoom and Pink Elephant. Claire Dowling who with husband Nick runs the beachside boite told us they'll be keeping the action going til October 15.